For the want of an apostrophe ...........

In a move which would seem to confirm David Hockney's fears that gay community is becoming boring and curmudgeonly ((see last-but-one post) It was reported yesterday that a homosexual married couple in Sevenoaks have complained to their MP about the naming of a cul-de-sac as Bangays Way.

Come on guys, loosen up a bit! One could understand offence being taken if it had been named Ban Gays Way, but there is bugger all to get humpy about here. The road was in fact named after well-known councillor, the late Frank Bangay. Would the protesters have insisted that Frank changed his name by deed poll?

Of course all this brouhaha would have been avoided if the local council had used the much maligned apostrophe. In a policy decision which seems patronising (at the least) or more likely down-right ignorant, many local authorities have now taken to omitting apostrophes from all road names on the grounds that "their inclusion leads to confusion". 

No mates, apostrophes are very simple to use and just need people to spend five minutes or so acquainting themselves with the uses of this punctuation mark.

This is dumbing down and a unilateral abandonment of part of our rich language!

So come on Borough Green Parish Council, make it Bangay's Way if you want to honour the late councillor individually or Bangays' Way if you want to honour the late councillor's family as a group who contributed much to your community.

For those of you suffering apostrophic angst, have a look at the website of the splendid Apostrophe Protection Society, and for some fabulous examples of apostrophe abuse set to a musical background see this clip, The Apostrophe Song on Youtube.



Whilst some of our gay chums seem to be getting a bit of a bum-rap (careful! - Ed.) in the above item, your correspondent was very pleased to see that one of Europe's more enlightened societies is confident enough to use reference to their liberality in the defence of their country.

Sweden has been having a problem of late with that nice Mr Putin sending his submarines into their territorial waters. In a bid to counter this The Swedish Peace and Arbitration Society have installed a "singing sailor" that emits a Morse code signal saying "this way if you're gay" (Just a thought, is there a Morse code sequence to signify an apostrophe?). The animated neon sign which has been lowered into the depths features a sailor wearing a fetching cap and white underpants and thrusting his hips.

That sign in full. 'Gay since 1944'
refers to when Sweden legalised gay marriage

The sign plays on the fears of the allegedly homophobic stance of the Russian military.

To see the sign in its (no apostrophe! Good work - Ed.) full animated glory complete with Morse code message click here. 

This is great work chaps! "Make Love not War" may be antiquated but it still holds good.

I couldn't resist showing you a photo of the the Swedish sailor going down(!)

Finally, there has been a real kerfuffle this week about the publication of some letters that the Prince of Wales sent to Cabinet Ministers. Good on the old fellow. I mean, he is a bit of a fruitcake with his talking to plants and espousal of dodgy alternative medicine techniques, but at least he's sufficiently interested in what's going on to have an opinion! The real surprise on the part of the great British people may have been incredulity that a member of the House of Windsor could actually write in joined-up script.

"Of course one always uses apostrophes correctly!"